The blessing of the bride's mother (as well as the groom's parents) is a very beautiful rite that came to us from ancient times. At that time they attached great importance to it. Unless the bride's mother's words of blessing were spoken, in the past the bride and groom were not allowed to get married in church. In addition, the girl was disinherited and shamed in society.
Nowadays, the words of blessing from the mother of the bride no longer have such significance, but parental parting words still play a big role for the newlyweds. It’s always nice to hear the appropriate words, don’t you agree?
Parting words. Blessing of the bride's mother in front of the registry office. Parents' words
At modern weddings, parents bless their children before entering the banquet hall. This already happens after marriage. The newlyweds are greeted with a loaf of bread, wine, bread and salt.
However, this version of the ritual is simplified. Some families still prefer to honor ancient traditions. The bride should hear parting words from them. The blessing of the bride's mother in front of the registry office, the words of the parents - all this should happen twice. The first time was just before the wedding. This is done in the father’s house before leaving for the registry office. Moreover, the parents of the bride and groom bless their children separately. Then the young people can go to painting. The second blessing is in the banquet hall.
How to meet newlyweds
When parents come out to meet the newlyweds after the wedding walk, this is a tradition that involves the transfer of family values to the bride and groom, it symbolizes the education of a new generation and the direct connection between parents and the newlyweds. Historically, the newlyweds lived in the groom’s parental home, and after the wedding, the young couple went exactly to where their parents met them on the threshold with bread and salt.
Nowadays, this ritual has lost its relevance; more precisely, the meeting place of the newlyweds has changed, since many newlyweds have their own home and have to be met on the threshold of the establishment where the wedding table is set. Such changes have made small changes to the wedding traditions associated with the meeting of the newlyweds, but the folk signs that have appeared over the years during this meeting have undergone virtually no significant changes.
Meeting the newlyweds: traditions and signs
After the official registration procedure is left behind, the newlyweds and their retinue must visit the bride's home. This gives the young family a blessing for a happy family life. You don't have to spend a lot of time there - a short 10-15 minute visit is enough. It’s good if the parents seat the newlyweds in the “red” (honorable) place, thereby showing their respect for the couple’s decision. After this, the newlyweds can go to the place where the main celebration is planned. When the meeting of the newlyweds begins, the parents hold bread and salt, but it is forbidden for the wedding loaf to lie on a towel without embroidery. To do this, the towel is laid out so that the palms have embroidered edges, and the middle clean part sags in the middle. Embroidery symbolizes happiness and health, good luck and prosperity, so bread should absorb these wishes. The wedding loaf with which parents greet the newlyweds, as wedding traditions say, must be kissed three times. However, under no circumstances should you break off or bite off pieces of it.
When the parents come out to greet the newlyweds, the father must pour them a glass of vodka. However, the couple should not drink it - they take the glasses in their right hand, bring them to their lips and abruptly pour them over their left shoulder. This action is repeated three times, but after the last time the vodka is not poured out, but rather thrown over the left shoulder of the glass. This ritual is associated with the belief that on the right hand of a person is his guardian angel, and on the left is the tempter demon. By pouring vodka over their left shoulder, the newlyweds close the path to evil. It was believed that if, after the glasses were thrown away, they both broke or both survived, then family life would be long, strong and happy. Rituals should be performed so as not to spill salt, as this promised trouble and was a bad omen. While the parents went out to meet the newlyweds with bread and salt, the bride's grandmother had to take a new lock, open it, put it on the threshold of the house and cover it with a special towel. Immediately after the newlyweds crossed the threshold of the house, the grandmother had to roll up this wedding towel and close the lock. The towel was handed over to the newlyweds, the groom's parents received the lock, and the bride's parents received the key to it. This was a guarantee that the wedding was a success and no one would separate the newlyweds until the lock could be opened. In ancient times, the founder of the house, who was supposed to protect it, was buried under the threshold; accordingly, the threshold is a death zone. The bride enters into marriage in order to continue her family and the groom’s, therefore, in order to prevent her from accidentally touching the death zone, the groom takes her in his arms and carries her into the house along the red field of the lined towel. The path laid out in front of the young is usually sprinkled with flowers, grain, rice, coins or flower petals. This is usually done in order to distract evil forces from the young.
In ancient times, it was believed that if the newlyweds did not receive a blessing, they would have an unhappy life together. Nowadays, young people do not pay attention to this. Ancient rituals and beliefs have become a thing of the past. Many young people live together for a long time without asking their parents’ permission and inform them of their desire to get married only after they submit the application to the registry office.
But now, more and more often, many couples, after officially getting married, decide to hold a wedding ceremony. This is why it becomes so important to bless the children before the wedding.
At all times, parental blessing was considered special for a son and now it becomes quite important before the wedding, so many parents need to know how to properly and at what moment to bless their son at such a serious moment in life.
Seeing off the bride at the registry office
Seeing off at the registry office is a special ritual that the father must perform. The groom should not be nearby, everything should take place only between the bride’s parents and the bride herself. Parting words are spoken, the girl is blessed with the icon of the Mother of God.
Next, the father takes his daughter by the hand and walks her around the table three times. This should be done clockwise. After this, the father takes the bride to the groom and hands her over.
How to escort your son from home to his bride?
The groom's parents should bless their son
, before he goes to pick up his future wife from his father's house.
Many do this simply in words, wishing the new family love, prosperity and peace. However, there is a long-standing tradition
, observing which it is possible to organize a farewell according to all Russian canons.
Rituals and customs for a wedding
A table is placed in the middle of the room and covered with a new white tablecloth.
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Fresh bread (preferably prepared by the mother's hands), clean water and salt, and a church candle are placed on it. First of all, parents take an icon of Jesus the Savior or St. Nicholas the Wonderworker
and bless their kneeling son. Then the father ties the groom’s hands with a towel and leads him around the table three times clockwise. Behind them comes the mother with an icon and a lit candle. Thanks to this ritual, the future head of the family receives the support of the clan.
Then the groom and his retinue go to the bride’s house to take the bride to the registry office or for the wedding. All his relatives and close friends accompany the groom from his parents' house. Everyone can express their warmest wishes, but the main ones are still considered to be the words of blessing from parents and elders.
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They begin to gather the bride at night. Before going to bed, the mother can comb her hair and braid it as a symbol of purity and purity. The wedding dress should also be prepared in the evening, so that in the morning the mother, grandmother, sisters and friends can take part in getting ready
without wasting time looking for things and accessories.
The ritual of blessing the bride itself is practically no different from seeing off the groom, except that the icon should be with the image of the Most Holy Theotokos. The father and mother also walk their daughter in a circle around the table three times and say parting words.
Seeing off the bride from home to the registry office
How to properly escort the newlyweds from the bride's house?
After the parents send the groom out of the house, he sits in the wedding cortege
and goes to the house of his future wife.
At the door, he is met by matchmakers who traditionally organize competitions and tests for the young man. There are many options for the ransom: the witness and the groom must answer tricky questions about the bride, and also offer a large sum of money for her. Nowadays, many refuse this custom, as they consider it incorrect in relation to the newlyweds who have already made their choice, but in most cases, bride price is part of the wedding script
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In order for the bride to be given to the groom, he or the witness may be subject to the following tests:
- say 10 compliments to your beloved;
- sing a song or recite a poem for her;
- name her date of birth, eye color and wedding ring size;
- answer questions compiled by the bride;
- give 10 wedding promises that the groom must fulfill in the first year of marriage.
When the ransom is completed, the young people are allowed to meet. The groom enters the bride's room
– this is one of the most touching moments of the day. From there, the two of them are accompanied by their parents: with icons of the Savior and the Mother of God in their hands, they read a prayer and raise a cross in the air three times over the heads of the young people. These icons are subsequently considered a special relic protecting the new family. After the blessing, the newlyweds must thank their parents by kissing them three times and then bow to the threshold. Next, the parents ask the guests to bless the marriage of their children, to which everyone present shouts: “God bless!”
How to see off the bride and groom
This is where the farewell ends, and the bride and groom can safely go to the registry office or church.
Some believe in rituals, some don’t, but one thing remains unchanged: parents must give their consent to the marriage of their children, do it sincerely and from the heart. When releasing your daughter and son into family life, you must definitely show your favor and approval, then the life of the newlyweds will be calm, happy and joyful.
Traditionally, a wedding begins with a bride price. It is held before the groom meets the bride on the day of the celebration. This ritual is one of the unchanging traditions that accompany a wedding. The ritual has deep roots. In ancient times, in order to take a girl who was the first assistant in the house, it was necessary to give something in return.
The groom tried to cover the inconvenience that would arise due to the girl leaving home by giving valuables, livestock and other gifts in return. In our times, this ritual takes place symbolically, and its task is not to bargain for money, but to add zest and gaiety to the event. Let's take a closer look at how to buy a bride, what the groom and witnesses should do, so that everyone is satisfied and the procedure does not drag on.
Witnesses are often involved in organizing the bride ransom. But the main part still falls on the bridesmaid.
Some couples turn to the toastmaster for help, who can develop a script for competitions and other nuances. The ransom ceremony consists of a number of competitions and tasks for the groom and witness.
All questions concern the hero of the occasion. If the groom cannot answer any of them, then he must pay a certain amount or present champagne, sweets, etc.
In some cases, the redemption process can be divided into several stages:
- Even on the road, the groom may be met by distant relatives and neighbors and demanded to pay for the opportunity to travel and tell the name of the bride.
- Close friends of the young woman are waiting for the groom in the courtyard.
- Immediately before entering the bride's room, the test is carried out by the witness and bridesmaids.
- The task of the groom and the witness is not to deprive anyone and to make some payment.
The main task of all participants in the ransom ceremony is not to delay the process. Otherwise, you may be late for registration.
What icon is used to bless the groom?
The groom is blessed with an icon of the Savior. This is the most common image of Christ. He has a book in one hand, and with the other hand he blesses the person who is looking at him. The Savior is asked to ensure that prosperity reigns in the family. Previously, this icon was the first to be brought into the house of the spouses. Now the groom's parents use it to bless their son for a happy marriage.
Parting words for the groom before the registry office
While the bride receives blessings from her parents, her own ritual is also carried out at the groom's house. The table is covered with a snow-white tablecloth. They put bread on it, put salt and water next to it, and a burning candle. The groom kneels down and receives a blessing from his parents. The father takes his son by the hand and walks him around the set table three times. The mother must follow them, holding an icon of the Savior and a candle in her hands. Thus, the son receives support not only from his parents, but also from his entire family. After this, the groom can go after the bride.
How to spend the newlyweds
The newlyweds must be escorted down the aisle, in accordance with the wedding rites, by parents who follow certain traditions when the newlyweds leave the parental home for a painting or wedding.
Seeing off the newlyweds by their parents is a very beautiful and touching ceremony that involves a wedding. Seeing off newlyweds differs significantly from each other, so let's look at each case separately.
Parents of the groom - How to send the groom off
There are some wedding rituals that need to be performed before escorting the groom out of his parents' house before the wedding celebration. Place a table in the center of the room and cover it with a completely new (preferably light) tablecloth. A loaf of fresh bread is placed in the center of the table, a bucket (or jar) with clean water, a full salt shaker are placed next to it, and the Sretensky candle is lit (it is also called the loud one). The groom's parents take home icons and bless their son with them, and after that the father must tie his son's hands with a special towel and circle him around the table three times. The mother should follow them, holding a home icon and a loud candle. This allows the groom to gain support from his family. After this, the groom's parents stand at the threshold, take the wedding towel and wrap it in its embroidered edges over a fresh loaf of bread (necessarily unopened and round in shape). Parents hold the towel in such a way that an arch is formed under which their son must pass. This is a tribute to the ancestors who protect the inhabitants of the house, because in order to pass, the groom will have to bow to the threshold. And in ancient times, the founder of the house was buried precisely under the threshold of the house, so that even after death he would not allow ill-wishers into the house. The home icon that was used in the ritual should be left at home in the red corner, but the loud candle was given to the matchmaker on the road, relying on it as a powerful amulet.
Parents of the bride - How to send the bride off
The parents of the bride (newlywed) must also perform certain wedding rituals before walking the bride down the aisle. The father must gird the girl with a special towel, after which she must be led around the table three times. They walk around the table only clockwise, following the direction of the sun. After this, the father brings the bride to the threshold and hands her over to the groom. Then they repeat the same ritual that was carried out in the groom’s house, but they now bring two children - the bride and groom. It is important that when parents create an arch from a towel with loaves of bread wrapped in its edges, the mother should stand on the left side of the entrance (this part is considered female), and the father should stand on the right (male power is concentrated there). The bride and groom must bow to the threshold, passing under the arch, and then the parents turn to everyone present in the house with a request6 “Good people, bless the young!” To which the guests must answer in chorus three times “God bless!”
Words of parental blessing to the bride and groom
Blessing the mother of the bride at a wedding is a very important ritual. However, it doesn't really matter much what is said. It is much more important that all words come from the heart, so that the parting words are sincere. Only then will children be truly happy, and will have a life ahead filled with happiness, joy and children's laughter.
What they usually want:
- well-being in the family,
- many years of happy marriage,
- health for newlyweds and their children,
- happiness in your own home.
By the way, the bride and groom should receive words of blessing not only from their parents, but also from each other’s parents. There is a belief that such a union will only become even stronger. It’s not for nothing that after the wedding, young people call each other’s parents “mom” and “dad.”
