Matchmaking
Early marriages are encouraged in society, which is dictated by concerns about observing the rules of chastity. In addition, the older generation categorically does not approve of dating and any kind of privacy of the couple. Such “attacks”, however, do happen, but for the most part they end in a hasty wedding. In most cases, acquaintances occur at crowded weddings, celebrations of relatives' birthdays and when receiving guests from afar, in which all family members participate.
However, in fact, they find out about the growing bride long before the meeting - word of mouth helps. Close communication and mutual participation in the lives of each family created an ideal platform for the lightning speed of news dissemination. Good candidates are looked at personally, but their financial status, honor and respect for the family, and prospects are assessed in advance.
In some clans, parents can advise this or that person, but do not force them to choose. Quite the contrary - as soon as the son hints at an interest in the young lady, matchmakers are sent to her house. In others, the wishes of the children are not taken into account at all, since the wedding is agreed upon when they are still in infancy. And the celebration itself is held shortly after this, sometimes the children do not even reach their teenage years.
During matchmaking, the bride's father negotiates the ransom amount, time frames and costs are assigned. At the same time, only the male half of both families is present in the room. For women this is a complete taboo; any advice is accepted in advance. Custom requires the presence of two attributes that distinguish an ordinary meeting of two friends from an official ceremony:
- Branches hung with banknotes and coins or bottles of sparkling wine;
- A loaf that is carefully baked by close relatives of the future bride. It is brought on a red towel as a sign of the holiday.
As soon as the head of the girl’s family allows them to be placed on his table next to the treats, the matchmakers and groom understand that they have been given potential consent.
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Color of celebration
If newlyweds around the world on the eve of the wedding always have many questions about the choice of colors, style and decoration design of the room in which guests will be received, everything here has long been a foregone conclusion. Of course, in many ways the decorations may differ from the classic ones and the gypsy bride today will definitely wear white, but the traditional color has remained unchanged - it is red.
He will wear elements of the costume of the groom, his retinue and all the men at the holiday, and the house should definitely be decorated with scarlet ribbons. If the Germans value pedantry, the British value punctuality, then for the gypsies passion, fire, and love come first. It is precisely these qualities that this rich shade symbolizes.
Gold-diamonds and white limousine
Hundreds of invited gypsies must make sure that both the 19-year-old bride - with a rich dowry, and the 20-year-old groom are a match for her, not a fool. Therefore, the best restaurant was booked in the small town of Michalovce to entertain the dear guests. And the video from the wedding ceremony immediately became mega popular among thousands of users. The suit of the thin groom and the breathtaking outfit of the plump bride were in harmony with each other: the festive vestments were made to order in white and gold precious decor.
The main decoration of the gypsy wedding was Evka’s chic dress, decorated on expensive white fabric with gold embroidery and real stones. To complete the look of the newlywed, they gave her a high hairstyle and adorned her with a truly royal tiara - made of pure gold with the image of lions' heads. Of course, it couldn’t be done without massive earrings, bracelets and impressive rings.
Happy Luka set off the beauty of his chosen one and was dressed to match her. A snow-white suit with a little less than that of a young gypsy, an abundance of gold embroidery and a stunning flower boutonniere. All with real gems and other indecent luxury. And, of course, a huge white limousine. It seems that the glorification of money and wealth at this wedding has already reached its climax. But here the gypsy scale and demonstration of superiority know no bounds.
Selecting the day and month of celebration
The date is agreed upon during the matchmaking process so that both families have time to prepare. Mostly preference is given to the warm season. Historically, this is due to the tradition of eating while sitting on carpets. In this case, the festive tables were raised slightly above the ground to make eating comfortable. The manner of the ceremony has, of course, changed, but it is in the summer that a greater number of marriages take place among Roma. The celebration itself takes place in three stages, so it takes at least three days.
First day - Bachelorette party. Men and women, without exception, eat at separate tables. In the fun and dancing, there comes a moment when the matchmakers demonstratively show their consent to the marriage and this moment is considered the beginning of the celebration of the creation of a new family. The bride's father takes her to the center of the hall to dance with the groom, and then other guests join them. This is the culmination of the celebration, since the most important event is ahead for which you should prepare.
Second day - Ceremony. Everything here is very similar to the usual wedding chores: the bride’s sisters, mother and friends help her, put on a fluffy dress, and the veil is sometimes replaced by a tiara or crown. The dress is often new or given by a sister, since renting is considered bad manners. Others display pre-prepared treats - almost every woman in the family takes part in their creation, since the feast should be rich and generous.
An elegant girl comes out to the guests with a dance to demonstrate her beauty and joy from the upcoming event. Then her relatives accompany her to the location of the holiday and there the parents bless the newlyweds with an icon and bread. To wish for a sweet and easy life together, water is poured at your feet and sweets are sprinkled. At this moment, each guest can give a gift to the new family.
The banquet is bright, with songs and dances. At a certain moment, the couple is escorted to the bedchamber. Everything that happens outside the door is not considered a sacrament. Relatives are waiting for the young couple to appear and hope for a good outcome of the action, as evidenced by such an unusual gypsy ritual as the “carrying out of honor.” Third day. There must be lamb soup on the table. This traditional “gastronomic reception” comes in very handy, given the scale of the feasts of the previous days. The wine flows like a river, the guests continue to have fun, and the wife’s relatives present her dowry. Moreover, this is not done modestly, in person, but right in front of everyone, as evidence that the girl did not come empty-handed to her husband’s house.
This may give rise to inappropriate sad thoughts about divorce during the wedding, but it will save the bride in the future from leaving with nothing after a failed marriage. Initially, the dowry was presented literally - pillows, blankets, kitchen utensils, and clothes were put on display. Today they prefer to show money, gold and other jewelry.
Traditions and customs of the gypsies
Few people know about how a gypsy wedding takes place. The traditions and customs of a gypsy wedding have evolved from generation to generation. A luxurious gypsy wedding lasts exactly three days, hence the name “luxurious”. A peculiarity of gypsies getting married is the lack of registration in the registry office. They don't accept this. Spouses can officially seal their bonds only with the consent of the baron and the community. Just like the gypsy community gives its consent to further married life. They do not provide for divorce. Long-standing traditions of gypsy weddings also include chastity before marriage. On the first day of the wedding, the newlyweds sit separately at a set table so as not to touch each other.
Beautiful gypsy weddings differ from village ones in that the newlyweds receive a Blessing with Orthodox icons. Poor village weddings of the newlyweds are greeted with simple bread or a loaf. The whole village attends poor weddings. First, the groom's parents give a bride price for the bride, after which the wedding day is set and preparations begin. On the first day there is a bachelorette party. On the second day the main celebration begins. The bride is given a gorgeous bouquet. The groom drinks a large glass of wine for family well-being and prosperity. It is important to know that a girl cannot contradict her father. If a groom has been chosen for her, she must humble herself and submit to the will of her elders.
Blessing with an icon or bread
Most Roma are Christians, and those living in Russia are Orthodox. Considering that official registration of marriage is not mandatory for them, the wedding remains the only evidence of the combination. This ritual necessarily includes a blessing from the parents, as evidenced by the presentation of symbols of faith - bread and icons. By the way, there are quite a lot of them in the Roma house, and gold and the magnificent decoration of the images are an integral attribute, since all this is very impressive to the people themselves.
Feast
Today, for celebrations, wealthy gypsies rent large halls with 300-500 seats in hotels and restaurants. A modest event takes place among the lower stratum of the community, who often still change their habitat frequently. Here guests are invited to the groom's house or courtyard. The center of attention is the table of the newlyweds and their witnesses. The most honorable places are occupied by parents, older relatives and respected families. There is always a lot of entertainment for guests - from invited artists to a traditional dance circle, in the center of which 2-3 girls dance, and boys join them.
The banquet leaves no room for hunger - all days of the celebration the tables are crowded. Complex people abound, involving several culinary processes at once. If the celebration is at home, the entire menu, without exception, is prepared by the female half of the family, including the bride. Restaurants also cannot do without their own dishes.
No one restrains themselves when it comes to alcohol, but they also don’t get drunk to the point of inappropriate behavior. After all, as mentioned earlier, in this case there is a great risk of disgracing yourself to the whole family and ruining your reputation for a long time.
Who did the money waterfall hit?
While Evka danced in a money dance, one of the relatives enthusiastically scattered euros among the guests, sprinkled five hundred and gold coins on the heads of the young people. A real financial rain fell not only on the gorgeous couple getting married, but also on all the invitees. No one was left offended. The generous gypsy many times presented each violinist and troubadour with cash, slipping large sums of money directly under the strings of the satisfied musicians. Interestingly, torn pieces of euros also fell on Evka’s head - all from the hands of the same hospitable relative. Now Luke’s life partner should certainly turn into a big magnet for cash flows.
By the way, when the holiday passions subsided, the husband and wife sat down at the table and started accounting. And with the most serious faces. They began to count how many crisp bills there were in those bundles that the generous uncle did not have time to scatter. And what directly went to the heroes of this enchanting holiday. Love is love, but there is no time for sentimentality. The main thing is to combine debit with credit.
Tradition "Take out of honor"
Not so long ago, on the first wedding night, which, as we remember, takes place during the banquet of the second day, two adult women, representatives from each family, entered the bedchamber with the newlyweds. Today they are waiting outside the door to announce the good news as early as possible - that the bride was chaste and the marriage is valid.
Otherwise, all agreements are terminated on the spot, and the girl’s family is covered in shame. They may even temporarily excommunicate you from the community, as a sign of which they will shave your head. Such options are extremely rare, because they try to marry off very young girls.
To testify to purity and purity, women take a white sheet with scarlet spots out of the room. Some gypsies cover the heads of the newlyweds with it, others strew it with red rose petals, and others pour vodka on it. Now the wife appears in a new, already red outfit, and with her head covered with a scarf - she will already be inseparable from him.
Evka's fiery dance in banknotes
The second appearance of the newlyweds to the guests, according to tradition, should be in red vestments. Evka’s scarlet satin dress and the groom’s purple suit with the same tie completed the fashionable outfit of the “golden youth”. But what is this output in paper notes? Was the bride really adorned this time not with jewelry, but with dozens of euro bills, real and large ones at that? This is true! Let the newly made wife attract abundance into the family. Well, the fact that she looks like a walking ATM doesn’t bother anyone at a wedding, it’s just the way it is.
Rituals of a gypsy wedding, or why a gypsy bride cries
The key cause of sadness is the tradition of “re-educating” the daughter-in-law, who, once in her husband’s house, becomes a servant for all its residents, without exception. A special highlight is the relationship with the mother-in-law, who all this time will guide her every step, trying to create the ideal match for her son. Also, do not forget that some marriages are concluded without the consent of the main characters of the holiday, and not everyone can marry someone they don’t love. After the young lady has become a wife, she is forbidden to return to her usual life and communicate with her friends. In addition, her appearance changes - always in a scarf, long dress or skirt.
In marriage itself, a woman has a difficult fate. The rule of being silent and agreeing with any will of your husband is ironclad. When her father leaves the house, she is the one who takes care of the financial support of the family. Cheating on her part is categorically unacceptable, while the stronger sex is allowed to do so.
Bride's dress at a gypsy wedding: what should it be like?
It's no secret that gypsies love gold and money. Therefore, when choosing an image, a gypsy bride often thinks about how much it will cost her. Moreover, it is not at all necessary that the dress fits her figure perfectly, and that the jewelry goes well with it. The main principle is expensive and rich.
And yet, we can highlight some features that are characteristic specifically of the wedding dresses of this nation:
- Fluffy skirt. A gypsy-style wedding dress must have a multi-layered skirt. Some models have up to 24 layers of fabric. Of course, such lush wedding dresses create inconvenience. But, as you know, beauty requires sacrifice.
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- Richly decorated bodice. The top of the outfit is traditionally decorated with sequins, lace, beads, gold embroidery, precious stones, and pearls. Sometimes gypsy wedding dresses are even decorated with banknotes!
- Not just white. In most cases, girls choose classic white, but dilute it with gold or red.
According to tradition, the emphasis in the image of the bride at a gypsy wedding is not so much on the dress itself, but on accessories and jewelry. The principle “the more and more expensive the better” also applies here. Gold chains and necklaces, earrings with diamonds, bracelets and rings – girls boldly wear everything at once. The concept of “overkill” is basically absent here. Interestingly, all jewelry should be made exclusively of gold. Platinum, although it is no less valuable, is not liked by gypsies, since it looks like silver.
Another important component in the image of a gypsy bride is the red ribbon in her hair. Often girls use a crown as a decoration on their head.
