Any wedding celebration takes place according to certain traditions and rituals. It begins with the bride price and ends with the sale of the cake. In addition, there are other, no less significant ceremonies.
One of the most sentimental and lyrical is the tradition of lighting a family hearth. Since ancient times, it was the flame from a candle that was considered a symbol of warmth, comfort, harmony, happiness and family. That is why parents, as the closest people, transfer their warmth to the home of a young family.
Where did the tradition come from?
Not all rituals performed at modern weddings have long historical roots. One of these recently invented ones is the lighting of a family hearth. This beautiful, impressive sight echoes the need for an open fire in the homes of our ancestors. But the ritual of its (fire) transmission never existed.
This ritual was invented by our contemporaries, wedding planners. It involves all the main characters of this celebration: the groom, the bride and their parents. The ritual is highly significant for a young family. This is a kind of blessing from parents to create a happy family for their children. The ritual confirms the beginning of their new, family life.
Interesting!
Interesting signs or tribute to traditions at a wedding
Wedding signs are an endless topic of discussion. Are they important, should you stick to them, and what do they mean? In the modern world of weddings, there is practically no place left for the good old traditions. I don’t know whether this is good or bad, but sometimes it’s still interesting to delve into the past and find out why exactly everything is done this way and why all these conventions and rules are needed.
Oddly enough, even now, there are so-called “fashionable” wedding traditions. Almost no holiday is complete without a wedding bouquet and cake - and these are already wedding rituals. Of course, over the years, the rituals have changed a little and acquired more modern motifs. Therefore, I would like to share this interesting knowledge with you.
What is needed for the ceremony
Not everyone knows how to properly light a family hearth at a wedding and what is needed for this. The main accessories of the family hearth lighting ceremony are candles. There are no strict requirements for size, quality and appearance: there is only one thing - quantity. There should be three candles. Modern rituals allow variations in the design of accessories in accordance with the style of the wedding celebration.
Most often these are three light-colored candles, one large and two thin. But they can also be curly, floating, flavored.
In order not to lose the solemnity and main meaning of the ceremony, it is recommended to adhere to several simple rules when choosing candles.
- The central figure of the composition is the newlyweds’ candle. It should be larger in thickness than others, since it will have to burn longer and more often. But a larger size is also desirable because it is to this element of the composition that the attention of those present will be drawn.
- The design of accessories may include a variety of ribbons, bows, lace, and plastic accessories with wedding symbols. There may be decorations in the form of engraved patterns, monograms, the first letters of the names of the bride and groom. The same wish applies to the design of candles: they should all form a composition in the same style. But the central candle for the newlyweds can be decorated more impressively than the other two.
- If the wedding ceremony involves further handling of the candle after it is lit, precautions must be taken to prevent wax spillage. For a photo shoot or visiting guests, it is advisable to have a candlestick or stand that matches the style of the overall candle composition.
- For parents, it is advisable to choose thin candles. This advice is dictated by two reasons: thin ones are much faster and more convenient to set on fire, this shape (long and thin) best sets off the spectacular central one.
Candles for the ceremony of lighting the family hearth are sold in all wedding salons. If you want to personalize your celebration, you can make accessories of any size and shape with your own hands.
Today, those newlyweds who had the ritual of lighting the family hearth performed at their wedding are thinking about saving their candle in order to light the fire from it at the wedding ceremonies of their children. This is how new rituals and traditions are born that will become significant for our descendants.
Script and words of the transfer of the family hearth
The ceremony itself can be carried out according to several interesting scenarios. The newlyweds should decide which of the script texts to choose even before organizing the celebration.
Think in advance which method suits you most.
- The host invites the mother of the bride and groom, the newlyweds. Mothers say warm words, while each woman holds a thin candle in her hands. At the same time, young spouses with a thick candle in their hands are waiting for their flame to light up. After kind words of parting words, mothers light the newlyweds’ candle. As a rule, this is the most touching moment, during which most of the guests present shed tears.
- The toastmaster asks the parents to light the candle for the young couple. Fathers get up and light mothers' candles with lighters or matches. Then the mothers carefully light the hearth of the young. Fathers in this ceremony symbolize the responsibility for creating a family.
- A candle stands on the table in front of the young couple. Mothers press their candles tightly together and light the hearth of the newlyweds. Thus, they convey all their boundless love, wishing harmony in the emerging family .
There is another, no less interesting ritual. After the young family hearth is lit. Absolutely all guests present are invited to stand in a tight circle, closing the young couple.
Pay attention to how the ceremony will be conducted. For a more spectacular perception, it is worth creating twilight or dim light. Then more attention is focused on the bright flame.
How the ceremony goes
Before lighting the family fire at the wedding, the toastmaster announces that one of the most important rituals for the newlyweds will now begin. Dim the lights and turn on beautiful slow music. We light the family hearth at a wedding as follows:
- The groom's parents approach the table from the groom's side:
- the bride's parents come up to stand next to their daughter;
- the newlyweds take their candle and hold it together;
- the groom's parents pick up the candle that is closest to them and light it;
- the bride's parents take their candle in their hands and light it too;
- at the same time, the newlyweds' parents bring their candles and light the newlyweds' candle.
The lit candles of the parents symbolize the fire of their home. By lighting a candle for their children, they convey to them a piece of the warmth of their homes and bless them for a happy family life. As a rule, the symbolic transfer of fire from two hearths is performed by the mothers of the newlyweds. Which is not surprising: a woman has long been considered the keeper of the home.
Interesting! While the family hearth is being lit at the wedding, the host can read poetry and parting words for the newlyweds. Parents can also congratulate their children and express their wishes regarding the future fate of the new family.
Often, after lighting the family hearth at a wedding, the young husband is given the floor. He reads poetry to his wife or addresses guests.
If the parents are not in full force
It happens that for some reason the parents of the newlyweds are absent or not present at the holiday. Who should light the family hearth at a wedding in this case? The central candle can be lit by the newlyweds themselves. If the bride's parents are absent, she lights her own candle from a thin one, symbolizing the hearth of her father's house.
The situation is similar with the groom: if his parents are not there, he himself takes their candle and lights the one that symbolizes the home of his new family. If the mother is not present, but the father is present, he participates in the candle lighting ceremony.
Wedding Hearth Tradition
The meaning of the ritual is very deep and one might even say sacred. But since close and dear people are present at the wedding, the candle is lit in front of a full hall. This requires complete silence and darkness.
All the lights in the hall are turned off and the most intimate things happen to the lyrical music and words of the toastmaster. The family hearth itself consists of two candles. One is in the hands of the parents, and the other is in the newlyweds.
Parents often say parting words and a congratulatory speech with a lit candle in their hands, and after the words have been spoken, they pass it on to the young family, lighting their candle with their flame.
A few recommendations
It is advisable to hold the ceremony of lighting the family hearth at the beginning of the wedding banquet. It is at this moment, when the guests’ attention has not yet wandered, that the ritual will be most impressive for everyone. The wedding scenario always includes many important rites and rituals, so it is recommended that the most significant ones be carried out at the very beginning of the banquet.
If you decide to carry out the ritual of lighting the family hearth at the end of the wedding celebration, you can involve all the guests in this action. To do this, each person present is given a small thin candle. Guests surround the newlyweds and pass the fire to each other, accompanying this action with kind words and wishes addressed to the newlyweds. This continues until the fire reaches the newlyweds’ candle.
Interesting!
How to decorate candles with your own hands?
Since the hearth is represented by candles, it becomes clear that they are the central place in the ceremony itself. It is especially important to beautifully decorate the candle of young spouses. It becomes the main focus of the entire ceremony. Parental foci are no less significant.
As a rule, they buy thin candles, which themselves are not very bright and noticeable. In order for the product to look bright and festive, it is worth thinking in advance about how it can be decorated.
There are several ways: both simple and more complex.
- ribbons;
- lace;
- rhinestones;
- beads;
- flowers.
What will you need?
Think about which method is closest to you.
From this alone, you will have to build on the materials you choose.
- Candle – 3 pieces.
- Candlestick – 3 pieces.
- Satin tape.
- Fresh flowers.
Step by step guide
Follow the simple instructions, then you will be able to decorate your family hearth.
- Place the candles in a candle holder and carefully remove any remaining paraffin.
- Wipe the candlesticks dry so that no dirt remains on them.
- Wrap each piece with a thick satin ribbon. At the same time, try to do it so that they all turn out to be approximately at the same level.
- Attach fresh flowers to the center, securing them with a needle.
Choose a satin ribbon based on the overall color scheme of the celebration. As for the flowers, they should be in harmony with the bride’s bouquet and the groom’s boutonniere. In addition, pay attention to their durability.
Since the ceremony will take place almost at the end of the event, your flowers should stand without water and retain their original appearance. The family hearth is a symbolic rite, so it would be extremely awkward if there were dried flowers or a crooked ribbon on it.
To ignite the hearth of your love, you will need the help of your parents. Ask them to prepare warm words or parting words for the young spouses in advance.
Interesting video: example of implementation
You can watch a video about lighting a family fire at a wedding, and find ideas for holding your own wedding ceremony in it.
The video will help you choose the words of the presenter to light up the family hearth at the wedding, write texts that the ritual participants will speak, and borrow ideas for decorating the banquet. You will make your wedding truly impressive and unforgettable.
Alexandra
Wedding planner, blogger, marketer, athlete and just a beauty
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How to choose music?
There are several important criteria when choosing a musical background for a ceremony:
- the music should be without words, otherwise they may confuse the leader of the ceremony (even if the song sounds quiet);
- there should be no differences in volume, the track should sound evenly;
- the music should sound in the background, complement the speech, but not interrupt it in volume.
The best option would be compositions that feature solo violin, piano, and flute.
Also, it is worth preparing the audience 5-10 minutes before the lighting of the “family hearth”: from fast compositions (if there were dances before) you should delicately switch to more moderate ones, and immediately before the ceremony, turn on a slow song.
Thus, the transition to the substrate for the ceremony itself will be smooth. After completing the ritual, it is also worth maintaining a slow tempo in the music for some time.
Meeting the newlyweds after the ceremony
As is customary, the parents are the first to greet the young people. This could be after a solemn wedding ceremony at the registry office or after a beautiful outdoor ceremony.
Parents and guests build a living corridor and, according to the old rite, shower the young people with the following objects:
- Rice or millet is a symbol of procreation.
- Hops - symbolizes a cheerful and carefree life.
- Nuts - to create a strong marriage.
- Candy is a symbol of the sweet life.
- Small coins symbolize wealth in the family.
Nowadays, it is more common to shower the young with rose petals or other flowers. You can also use crackers with different confetti.
