Gypsy weddings: customs, traditions and rituals


Gypsies are perhaps the most mysterious people. They pass on their customs and rituals from generation to generation, which earns them great respect. But holidays, and especially gypsy weddings, rightfully receive special attention! And such interest becomes a kind of impetus for holding and decorating a wedding in the style of gypsy traditions.

The portal for brides www.svadebka.ws invites you to learn more about the wedding customs of the gypsies and, perhaps, take note of some traditions, diversifying your own celebration.

Preparations for a gypsy wedding

Education is not for Roma children

Gypsies are very reluctant to send their children to school, and if he goes there, it is only to learn how to read and write somehow. Such knowledge is given in the first and second grades - education at this level is considered sufficient for a normal life. From the age of 6-7, Roma boys and girls are accustomed to the family business (usually trade).

If you know a child from a gypsy family who, after finishing the third grade, is still going to school, know that he is simply wasting his time and does not help his parents at all, and this is not respected among representatives of the nomadic people.

What a luxurious and fun gypsy wedding it is?

She is 14, he is 12, instead of horses - a white Hummer and Priors, instead of a tent - one of the most expensive banquet halls in Astrakhan - “National”. This is what a gypsy wedding ceremony looks like in the 21st century. Of the obligatory ones - a maximum of gold, and a hundred guests.

Masha Chashnikova put on her best clothes and had a blast at the gypsy matchmaking.

The Hummer limousine rolls briskly towards the Kremlin. Several dozen young ladies and a bride fit inside. The crowd gathers near the white stone and spends a long time filming in the Brotherly Garden.

What stands out is the young lady in emerald with a selfie stick and a considerable amount of jewelry. Masha is allowed to touch a chain as thick as a finger with a pendant on which Medusa is shown - the symbol of the Versace abode in spheres of huge rhinestones. The medallion covers almost the entire palm. There are a maximum of scratches and abrasions on the reverse side. The second chain, smaller, seems completely different.

“My grandfather gave it to me. Yes, real gold,” the young lady says proudly and smiles.

The betrothed herself, Raika, behaves modestly. A noble tall girl with big eyes. Towering over her betrothed, she barely smiles when the 12-year-old boy awkwardly sniffs a huge bouquet of roses and walks away embarrassed.

A rosy-cheeked boy babysits a bottle of champagne for a long time. On the lawn, he opens the jam and throws out the container. Alcohol spills on the sidewalk. An over-aged man comes up to the child and grabs him by the hand, leading him to the dancing crowd. The boy sees the white stone for the first time. The numerous clan of the betrothed came from the Stavropol Territory for the ritual.

“We’ll give you 1-2 kilograms of gold. I myself got married at 15, I had a rich wedding. Well, yes, the rings are natural. Yes, they probably weigh a kilogram,” says the betrothed’s relatives arrogantly.

A luxurious wedding is traditionally organized by the bridegroom's relatives. But gypsy weddings are not always celebrated with gifts from countless relatives.

The main Astrakhan baron, Grigory Savchenko, in a red and blue suit, throws up his hands, convincing that this is matchmaking. Early marriages are prohibited in Russia, but the Romans who support such marriages have found a way out and marry children at the age of 12-13, and the wedding itself happens later after adulthood. In order for future spouses to become close to each other, reconcile and unite in marriage. The betrothed are sometimes stolen, but it is rare when relatives do not give the go-ahead or do not agree on a ransom.

They get married only after finishing school, the elder convinces. Nearby, several dozen girls and young ladies, hung with jewelry, are rejoicing; they obviously skipped school today.

Gypsies marry virgins. The chastity of a virgin is still examined by a red spot on the sheet, and if the bride turns out to be “spoiled,” there will be shame and financial expenses. Divorce in communities is rare. Love comes during marriage, Romans are sure.

Roma communities live in isolation. Romals see calm in black and white and clearly divide it into strangers and relatives, not allowing strangers in.

Quadcopter Marifa buzzes over the restaurant. In the hall are the highest circles of the local clans. The tables are filled with food - caviar in tartlets, appetizers, fish, cold cuts, fruit, cans of beer and bottles of cognac. Waving their fingers in rings, the stronger sex in lofty hats discuss matters. The wives sit on the left side of the newlyweds' table.

The young people themselves are reclining under a colorful shawl in the middle of the hall. Relatives take turns touching their bent backs with a loaf of bread, and then hand them a filled wine glass according to the gypsy tradition. The host, who specializes in gypsy weddings, will begin to announce toasts. Offerings are tomorrow. The next day, in the courtyard of the bride’s house, they will spend a long time unrolling three-meter carpets and showing off velvet trims from fabric shuttle bags. And today, jingling their jewelry, gypsies dance carefree to dashing folk tunes - accordion and tambourine. The betrothed and the betrothed circle under the Lezginka. No “Black Eyes” or songs from the “Romen” ensemble are heard. There are elders in the hall who once roamed Russia. But few people keep horses, and no one misses the wagons. Young Romans prefer to go to the capitals without a chaise, in pursuit of wages of dubious legality.

"Study at school. Afterwards, I think I’ll do something positive, like all my relatives. Well, probably to sell fur coats,” the boy blurts out vividly.

The ninth grader continues to talk about traditional versions of the gypsy business. Behind him, the bride and groom cut a multi-tiered cake. They awkwardly taste sweets from each other’s forks and turn away embarrassedly. At the end of the ceremony, one of the guests, together with the host, sings a viscous song of unknown origin.

Two skirts and an apron

Any gypsy woman must wear a pair of skirts and an apron, regardless of the circumstances. It's all about the woman's "uncleanness" in the area below the waist, which is transferred to the petticoat - under no circumstances should you touch it. Of all the attire, the cleanest is the apron, which covers both the upper and lower skirts, which are in contact with each other. It is on it that dishes and hands are constantly wiped, and children can also lean against it.

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Early families

It is quite normal for Roma to plan families for their own children. The issue of girls’ marriage arises even when they are barely 14 years old - this is the age that nomadic people consider the most acceptable for getting married and creating a serious relationship.

By the way, it is during someone’s wedding that girls look for grooms. They love to attract the attention of the men around them by dancing and joking, perfectly understanding the responsibility of the moment, because it was them who came to see both the potential grooms themselves and their fathers.

Few people know that a 19-year-old gypsy who has never been married is an old maid who is not at all interesting to men.

Love for gold

Gold for gypsies is not just a material good; love for this precious metal has a deeper meaning. The way of life of the people has made such an investment of one's own wealth very convenient - gold items can be carried with you, exchanged, hidden, stored, without worrying that they will depreciate or deteriorate.

The passion for brilliance and ostentatious luxury, bright, catchy outfits has led to the fact that it has become the norm to wear a wide variety of jewelry: massive, noticeable. More voluminous gold items could be hidden under clothes, and up to eight kilograms of them in the form of coins, chains, jewelry, etc. were accumulated in the body bags-belts of gypsies.

The custom of wearing rings, bracelets, chains, earrings and all kinds of pendants, and making clothing items out of gold, still manifests itself not only on holidays, but also in everyday life.

In addition, traditions associated with gold have developed: for example, a son must double what he received from his father.

Part of a bride's outfit at a gypsy wedding

Fraternization of husband and wife

Even among modern gypsies it is customary to carry out the fraternization procedure. As it turned out, it is carried out not only between men, but also between a newly made husband and wife.

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To carry out this ritual, cuts are made on the palms of the boy and girl with a special knife, after which the hands are folded together so that blood exchange occurs. This ritual symbolizes the special bond between husband and wife, as well as their duty to share all the joys and hardships, as well as acquired goods, until the end of their days.

What’s most interesting is that the fraternization ceremony can only be performed on the second day of wedding festivities, after their first wedding night.

Distinctive features of the celebration

An interesting feature of the holiday is the rite of fraternization, as a symbol of the eternal connection of young people.

Small wounds are made on the fingers of the newlyweds, and when droplets of blood appear, the hands of the newlyweds must be crossed to exchange blood.

Gypsy marriages are not registered in the registry office; usually young people get married in a church.

After fulfilling their first marital duty, the newlyweds must take out the cloth with blood stains and show it to the waiting guests. Now the bride becomes the official wife.

If there are no stains on the sheet, the marriage is canceled immediately. With such a shame, the bride’s family often moves, and the girl will never be approached for marriage again.

Internal court is not a fairy tale

Even in the modern world, there are cases when state justice is powerless, an example of this is the Roma court. If any dispute arises between representatives of the people, it is resolved within the framework of a congress of respected gypsies, whose duties include carefully listening to the arguments of both sides. This option for resolving relations is considered very important, and under no circumstances is it subject to publicity.

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As for punishments, they can be very different. The most terrible species of macaw is considered to be the Dali 24. A person who is sentenced to this type of punishment is obliged to leave the camp within 24 hours.

Two jars of gold for the bride

It is customary for gypsies to buy a bride for themselves, in the literal sense of the word. The currency used is gold, which is measured either in banks or in kilograms. The price for the bride is set by the men who protect the girl (fathers or brothers). As practice shows, very often a nominal fee is assigned - two three-liter jars filled with gold (chains, earrings, bracelets, rings, etc.).

It is worth noting that gypsies from different countries cannot marry each other - this is tantamount to a wedding with a “non-gypsy.” This happens because gypsies from different countries are considered different peoples - they never maintain contact with each other.

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A gypsy wedding is a very magnificent and beautiful event. It is customary for these people to organize a very rich table and the most colorful festivities in honor of this event. Even if a family lives very poorly, its members bend over backwards to surprise guests with the chic and scope of the celebration, which, as a rule, lasts more than one day. If the wedding is poorly performed, it is a great shame for the family.

Duration of weddings

Roma communities prefer to postpone the celebration until the summer. The celebration lasts about three days, but the richest gypsy weddings lasted for a week.

On the first day, to comply with customs, the parents of the bride bargain with the groom. But this is considered a pure formality. After a blow on the hands of the matchmakers, the contract is completed, and the bride dances with the groom's father.

On the second wedding day, the female half of the invitees participate in getting ready for the bride. A cheerful atmosphere reigns in the house and they begin to collect treats for the table.

Gypsies never rent wedding dresses; this is unacceptable for them. The dress must either be new or passed down through the hereditary line.

After the bride puts on her dress, she must dance with the guests. After performing the dance, the guests carry the bride to the newlywed's house.

Before eating the dishes, the newlyweds receive a blessing with an icon with bread and receive expensive gifts.

On the third day of the celebration, lamb soup is prepared. Guests display expensive gifts for everyone to see.


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This is a kind of proof that the bride is wealthy, and if there is a disagreement with her husband, she can leave, taking the jewelry with her.

Children save money for their parents' funerals

It is known that the gypsies celebrate not only weddings, but also funerals, and children are required to collect money for them, even while their mother and father are still alive. No one is insured against sudden death, therefore, in this regard, the Roma law obliges to organize collections of funds from each member of the community.

Gypsy funerals are very noisy, with dancing and singing - it is not customary to cry for the dead. Especially wealthy families install the most expensive tombstones for their deceased relatives, on which a full-length portrait is depicted - this is considered a special level of chic.

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