Meaning
A wedding symbolically means the unity of Christ in the form of the groom and the Orthodox Church in the form of the bride. The sacrament represents mutual vows of love and fidelity. After the exchange of rings and the solemn service, the bride and groom are considered spouses in the eyes of God, an unbreakable spiritual bond is formed between them, and the new family is blessed with a happy life and the birth of children. It is worth remembering that a wedding is forever, and there is no decrement ceremony. Peculiarity! Of course, the church meets the weak human nature halfway and allows remarriage, but only after penance, confession, and no more than three times in a lifetime. A civil unregistered marriage is also considered.
Choosing a place
At one of the first stages, a temple is selected where the ceremony will take place. It does not have to be large and respectable; many, on the contrary, prefer a quiet, peaceful church somewhere in the countryside.
Advice. The chosen place should evoke only good feelings and emotions; if you don’t like something, then it’s better to continue your search.
There will also be a meeting and acquaintance with the priest who will conduct the cherished ritual. You will have an interview with him, during which he must make sure how important marriage is for the couple and she understands all its seriousness, and does not chase the ceremony as a beautiful and fashionable trend.
Father, in turn, should also instill in you the disposition and feeling of trusting him. He is obliged to tell in detail important details, without reproaching you if you do not know some rules and canons of the Orthodox Church. You can also consult with him about controversial issues, for example, your appearance, rings, a photo shoot in the temple, the best date, and so on.
If you often go to confession with a certain clergyman, you have known him for a long time and trust him, then it would be a great idea to have your wedding with him.
What time after the wedding is best?
There is no clear answer to this question. You should take a serious oath only when you feel that you are ready for it. You must be sure that you will live with your chosen one all your life, accepting his disadvantages and weaknesses, pride and mistakes. A union consecrated by the church is a spiritual unity, a joint path to God, requiring inner maturity, wisdom, and tolerance.
According to the canons, a wedding is allowed both on the day of marriage registration, and after a month, a year, ten years - at any time when the realization of readiness for an important step comes.
If you want to become spouses before the state and before God on the same day, you should carefully plan the time of both celebrations. It is usually recommended to space the two ceremonies in time, since the newlyweds and guests may get tired of so many impressions.
As for the upper limit, there is none. You can seal the union with spiritual ties even after fifty years of marriage - and in this case it will definitely be a balanced and unchangeable decision.
Preparation
A wedding is possible only for newlyweds who have already formalized their relationship legally (exceptions are possible, but very rare). So, strictly speaking, any couple will get married after the wedding, the only question is how long their family life lasted.
If you just recently got married and the bride is innocent, then there are no special requirements. If your family has existed for some time, there are some nuances:
- According to the rules of the church only a virgin can wear a veil , while a wife who has already known her husband must cover her head with a light scarf (nothing, however, prevents you from decorating it with lace or making it from translucent fabric);
- If the bride is not getting married for the first time, then the dress should be chosen not snow-white, but any other light shade ;
- Older brides are advised to choose a cream, pastel, golden dress , even if this is her first and only marriage;
- Married couples need to remember that they should fast for three days before the ceremony - not eat animal food, tune in to spiritual cleansing and rebirth, and also avoid intimate relationships;
- A woman’s pregnancy is not an obstacle to the wedding, but on critical days it is strictly forbidden to attend church , so check your calendar.
Signs
- You cannot pass between those getting married during the ceremony - because of this, the family may break up;
- witnesses must wear crowns on the couple, otherwise such a union will not be considered valid;
- blow out the candles at the same time for a happy married life.
It is worth remembering that Orthodoxy does not approve of superstitions, so whether to listen to them or not is a purely personal matter.
Rules
Any church sacrament has certain requirements that must be observed. Thus, the bride’s outfit must be chaste, covering the neckline, knees, shoulders, arms (at least up to the elbows). Pantsuits, dark or bright colors are not acceptable.
Refrain from large ornate jewelry and bright cosmetics, pay special attention to the absence of lipstick, because you will have to kiss the cross.
The sacrament is not performed on fasting days or major church holidays. The wedding is impossible on Tuesday, Thursday or Saturday, because then the first wedding night falls on a fast day.
Important! If your passport contains a name that differs from the one you received at baptism, notify the priest about this in advance. During the sacrament, it will be necessary to use the second name given before God.
Both newlyweds must be baptized Orthodox Christians (with reservations, Christians of other denominations are allowed), who are not blood or spiritual relatives of each other, and who are not bound by other marriage vows.
In the case of a second wedding, it is necessary to obtain permission from the bishop to dissolve the previous marriage, as well as to enter into a new one. In addition, if the previous marriage was dissolved due to the fault of the newlywed, then one should repent and perform the assigned penance.
The minimum age of the bride is 16 years, the groom - 18. The maximum age is limited to 60 years for a woman and 70 for a man, but this rule is not strictly observed. For a couple who have lived a long life in a secular marriage, they will most likely make an exception and get married, even if one or both spouses are already advanced in age.
Attributes
- Wedding rings . They should be as simple as possible, without complex decor or large stones. If you follow all the rules, then the bride should choose silver, and the groom should choose gold;
- Icons : the Savior for the groom, the Mother of God for the bride, best of all - received as a gift from parents;
- White or pink towel , large enough to accommodate standing newlyweds;
- Pectoral crosses should be worn by both those entering into marriage and all guests of the sacrament;
- Wedding candles , which can be purchased at the church store, and white scarves with which you will hold them;
- Red wine (Cahors);
- Freshly baked bread is donated to the church.
Tip 8: How much does a wedding cost?
The cost of a wedding in a church depends on the temple in which the newlyweds decided to hold the ceremony. Temples set prices differently. There are churches where the price is set indefinitely, that is, how much money the newlyweds can contribute to donate to the temple. In other cases, wedding prices vary from 500 to 2000 rubles.
Tell us in the comments about how your wedding ceremony went. What emotions did you experience during this wonderful ritual? Did you follow all the wedding rules?
Ritual
The sacrament itself takes about an hour and begins with the betrothal. The priest takes the young people to church, showing that before God they are now one whole. Wedding candles are lit, prayers are read to those entering the marriage and incense is performed. At the end, the priest puts on the rings consecrated on the throne, and the husband and wife exchange them three times, confirming their intention to always be together.
Important! On the wedding day, the couple must come to the beginning of the service, and from 12 at night it is forbidden to eat, drink alcohol and smoke.
Then the sacrament of wedding itself begins. Its main part is the expression of consent to take each other as spouses before the world and God. Prayers are offered for the blessing of marriage, family happiness, spiritual purity and future children. The newlyweds are baptized with a crown, while the wife venerates the icon of the Mother of God, and the husband venerates the face of the Savior.
Next, the priest says the solemn “Lord, our God, crown them with glory and honor!”, after which he gives the young couple a cup of red wine - a symbol of joy. First, the husband should take a sip of the Cahors, followed by the wife. The couple is circled around the lectern three times, after which they are considered spouses in the eyes of the church.
What needs to be done before the Sacrament
Stick to fasting
Before the wedding, lovers need to cleanse themselves spiritually and tune in to the sacred ceremony. Therefore, it is necessary to fast for three days - do not consume dairy, meat and fish products, as well as eggs and alcohol. If possible, do not smoke.
Ask a priest for advice if, for medical reasons, you cannot live without any of the foods listed. Perhaps he will allow some relaxation.
In addition, before the wedding, at least three days, you should give up carnal pleasures, fun entertainment, parties and various festive events. The best solution would be to devote your free time to doing things together, for example, reading prayers.
Confess
On the eve of the sacred ritual, confession is certainly necessary for both spouses. It is necessary to tell the priest about all your sins without hesitation. Do not hide anything; on the contrary, having told everything bad, God will forgive you ugly actions, words and even thoughts.
There is no need to be afraid that someone will find out about your actions, because in the church this is completely excluded. Be honest with the priest and do not think that you will be judged. In this case, he acts as an intermediary between you and the Almighty. Father will also help you cleanse your soul and enter your wedding completely renewed and sinless.
Take communion
You will go through this stage on the day of the Sacrament, or rather, before it, during the morning liturgy. The process of communion is simple - the clergyman will give you a spoonful of red wine and a piece of church bread.
You will not be able to receive Holy Communion if you have not confessed.
Before communion, from midnight, you do not need to eat, drink or smoke. Some people who have a weak body and may faint can eat a small snack. But the food should not be meat, fatty or high in calories. It is better to give preference to yogurt or kefir.
