How to write a debunking letter sample. The procedure for debunking a church marriage after the spouses divorce and a list of reasons preventing a second wedding. How much does the ceremony cost?


It is believed that church marriage is the strongest. Wedding gives spiritual strength. However, reality shows that God's protection does not always work - marriages still break up. The question arises whether it is possible to get divorced if the marriage has broken up. In most religions this cannot be done, but in Christianity this practice exists. How does this happen? Let's figure it out.

Below we will talk about the main reasons that allow you to dissolve a church marriage. We will also answer common questions: what to do with the ring and whether it is possible to undergo the wedding ceremony again.

List of reasons

To dissolve a marriage, there are a number of actions condemned by the church:

  1. Cheating on one of the spouses. It is the main reason for divorce not only in the registry office, but also in the church.
  2. Official divorce also becomes a reason for debunking. Therefore, it is difficult to divorce your ex-wife after a divorce, but it is possible.
  3. Sexually transmitted diseases, addictions (gambling addiction, drug addiction, alcoholism). Psychical deviations.
  4. Acceptance of another faith by one of the spouses.
  5. Creation of new marriages.
  6. Criminal liability lies with one of the spouses.
  7. Domestic violence.
  8. Abortion.
  9. Attempted suicide.
  10. Sexual perversions: incest, polygamy.
  11. Infertility.
  12. Forced marriage.

Detailed instructions on how to get divorced after a divorce will be described below.

Is it possible to get married in church after a divorce and is it necessary, possible reasons

If irreconcilable differences nevertheless arose between the spouses and it was decided to divorce, then it is necessary to contact the registry office, where the formal procedure for divorce will be completed.

A church marriage is not concluded on paper, but before God; it is before him that the spouses are responsible for their family life.

For the church, as an institution, the concept of “debunking” does not exist, since it denies the very concept of divorce, putting the family first.

To be debunked means to enter into a new marriage in heaven, to get married again.

Here is a good video about civil marriage and debunking.

True, if you come to church and say that you want to get married or remarry out of boredom, you may be refused. The Church considers some specific reasons for divorce to be quite significant:

  • Cheating on one of the spouses,
  • An abortion performed by a wife without the consent of her husband, without medical necessity,
  • Change of faith by one of the spouses,
  • Incapacity for married life, and as a consequence for procreation, loss of legal capacity of a husband or wife,
  • Diseases that threaten the health of unborn children (AIDS, syphilis and others),
  • Entry of a husband or wife into another marriage,
  • Alcoholism and drug addiction of one of the spouses,
  • The risk of damage to the health of one of the spouses to the other,
  • Pimping,
  • Long-term absence of one of the partners,
  • Inconsistency with Christian canons: marriage between relatives, marriage before reaching adulthood.

Thus, you yourself can answer the question of whether the first marriage needs to be debunked. It is possible only through a second church marriage. Whether this can be done depends on the reasons given above.

Debunking procedure

It will be difficult for both husband and wife to obtain permission to debunk after a divorce. It has its own specific features and pitfalls. Let's look at them.

Where to contact

The first step is to contact your local church. They will tell you which diocese to send your petition for debunking.

It should be borne in mind that for unjustifiable reasons (low budget, inconsistency of characters, personal hostility) refusal is guaranteed.

In addition, if one of the spouses is ready to make concessions in order to save the marriage, then the church will be on the side of this person.

What documents are needed

The main documents required for the procedure for debunking a church marriage are:

  1. Divorcing passports.
  2. Certificate of divorce.
  3. Certificate of church marriage.

If there are any medical abnormalities that indicate the incapacity of one of the spouses, then it is also worth providing the relevant documents.

In addition to the package of these documents, a petition for debunking should be sent to the diocese. The church will tell you in what form and in whose name the document should be drawn up.

Price

A symbolic amount is paid for the procedure, set by the priests in each temple. As a rule, it does not exceed 500 rubles.

In addition, it is an optional fee; you can deposit money if you wish.

Debunking a church marriage

There is no procedure for debunking, unlike divorce at the civil registry office. The church does not annul a wedding, and does not issue a document of debunking.

How can you get debunked?

In fact, debunking is getting approval for a second wedding. But not everyone who was previously married in a church can receive it. According to Orthodox laws, the union of lovers concluded before the Lord is indissoluble. But there are exceptions to any rule, so there may be the following reasons for debunking:

  1. death of one of the spouses,
  2. long absence,
  3. inability to live married life,
  4. change of faith
  5. treason,
  6. abortion without spouse's approval,
  7. a disease that can be passed on to children,
  8. vicious lifestyle (crime, alcoholism, etc.),
  9. pimping.

For these reasons, according to the rules established in the Orthodox Church, debunking is possible.

Debunking procedure

Before getting married in church, your marriage, registered in the registry office, must be terminated. The termination conditions are as follows:

  • death of husband (wife),
  • invalid marriage from the moment of its registration,
  • dissolution of official marriage, divorce.

Depending on the reason for the termination of the marriage, you must receive the appropriate document from the registry office. And also, since dissolving a church marriage means obtaining permission for a second one, you need a certificate of legal registration of the new union. With these two documents, apply to the Diocesan Administration and write a request for permission to the ruling bishop. Its form is also different and depends on the reason for the termination of the first marriage. One of the spouses can apply to remove the crowns; the presence of both is not required.

Why can they refuse?

As you already understand, not everyone is allowed to get married a second time. The following reasons are not valid reasons for performing a debunking ceremony in the Orthodox Church:

  • did not get along,
  • husband/wife earns little and cannot support their family,
  • marriage of convenience,
  • love just passed away.

After you submit a request for permission, you will have a conversation with a priest, who will decide how objective the reasons for your divorce are.

So, is it possible to get divorced after a divorce? The answer to this question is: “No, you can only receive a blessing and get married again.” And if the reasons are not valid for the church, then you will be refused.

Church debunking: how does the ceremony take place?

The divorce from the first spouse is over, the second wedding has already taken place, and the conversation with the priest was successful. This means that you have received a blessing and can enter into an alliance before God for the second time.

Stages

Let's look at the rules of debunking in the Orthodox Church and the sequence of actions:

  1. Collect the necessary documents described in the previous paragraph.
  2. Submit a petition to the diocese addressed to the bishop. The form should be checked in the specific church at the place of application.
  3. Have an interview with a priest. It should indicate all the reasons for the debunking.
  4. Go through the wedding process again (if desired).

The procedure is simple, but very time-consuming. It can take from 3 months to a year. This depends on the working conditions and workload of the diocese.

Reasons for debunking

Remarriage within the walls of a church is permitted only after the diocesan bishop gives his blessing for the dissolution and new marriage. What do you need for this? A decision will be made based on the results of consideration of the submitted petition. A church marriage will be debunked if the head of the local church considers the reasons specified in the document to be significant. Each case is considered individually. If the reason is compelling, the marriage will be debunked even without the consent of the husband (wife). A list of fairly weighty justifications is given in the official document “Fundamentals of the Social Concept,” which is mandatory for all members of the Church.

This list includes:

  • adultery;
  • malicious abandonment of a spouse from the family;
  • abortion performed against consent;
  • mental disorder, sexually transmitted disease, chronic infection, HIV, AIDS;
  • committing a serious crime and being sentenced to imprisonment;
  • pathological addiction to alcohol, drugs, and other unnatural vices;
  • concealing from the future spouse the fact of having a problem or deliberately causing harm to one’s sexual reproductive health;
  • actual harm to the health of family members or threats;
  • renunciation of faith, transition to another denomination;
  • unknown disappearance for a long period.

What to do with a wedding ring

Despite the divorce and debunking, there are several points regarding the wedding ring.
Firstly, there are many signs associated with the loss of the first wedding ring, promising negative consequences and troubles for all family relatives, even death.

Secondly, it is recommended that in any case, regardless of the presence of repeated marriages, the wedding ring should be removed and hidden at home, but not thrown away or lost.

Thirdly, if there is no remarriage or wedding, then it is allowed to wear a wedding ring. This does not promise any troubles or sins.

Is it possible to get debunked

A wedding is not just a spectacular and fashionable ceremony, but an important and responsible step, one of the sacraments of the Church. A church marriage is not concluded on paper, God himself blesses a man and a woman to be one.

The value of such a union is of particular importance for believers. Its fundamental difference from worldly marriage is indissolubility, because church marriage is similar to the spiritual union of Christ with the Church, it is concluded once and for life.

The crowns placed on the future spouses by the priest symbolize the glory of such a union. The married couple receives the blessed strength to preserve the family, the husband and wife are bound to each other until death and while the spouse is alive they do not have the right to file for divorce.

The usual divorce procedure, which ends with the receipt of a divorce certificate from the registry office, does not deprive the former spouses of the status of husband and wife before God. Formally, there is no rite of dissolution of a consecrated marriage; a legal church divorce is the receipt of permission from the bishop for remarriage.

Wedding after divorce for the second time

In the church it is believed that a wedding is the marriage of spouses for a lifetime. However, in the modern world, many church ministers make concessions to those who want to undergo the wedding ceremony a second time. A more complicated process occurs the third time. In fact, you can only get married a maximum of 3 times in your life.

Wedding date

It is allowed to perform the ceremony on odd days of the week (Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Sunday).

True, holidays should not fall on these days:

  1. Easter.
  2. The beheading of John the Baptist (as well as his eve).
  3. The Exaltation of the Holy Cross (as well as its eve).

Also, weddings are not held during Lent and Maslenitsa week.

Preparation

Before the second wedding (as before the first), you should fast for three days.
You can confess and receive communion in advance. Some priests perform these rites right before the wedding ceremony. You should also prepare:

  1. Icons of Jesus Christ and the Virgin Mary. Either bring it from home or buy it.
  2. 2 wedding candles, white towel.
  3. Rings. You can't use the old ones, buy new ones.
  4. Pectoral crosses.
  5. Bride's outfit. It should be modest (all parts of the body should be covered) and light in color. The head must be covered. You should wear comfortable shoes as the process will be long.

Despite the fact that witnesses and guests are not allowed for a second wedding, it is quite possible to order a choir and ringing of bells.

Photo and video shooting should be discussed in advance. In some temples it is allowed.

Description of the ritual

The main difference between the second wedding and the first: the absence of crowns over the heads of the newlyweds. Even if the second spouse participates in the sacrament for the first time, he is not given a crown.

How the ritual takes place:

  1. At the church, the documents of the spouses and the petition addressed to the bishop are submitted. A voluntary amount is paid.
  2. If there is a blessing and an officially registered marriage, only the spouses and the priest should take part in the wedding process.
  3. The wedding ceremony is carried out similarly to the “first time”.

It should be remembered that the ceremony must take place with a complete decision to associate one’s destiny with a person. There must be respect, trust and responsibility for your choice. And, of course, love: not only physical, but also spiritual.

Nuances

Weddings are held only for those who have been baptized in Orthodoxy.
In some cases, an exception is made for representatives of Catholicism, Lutheranism and Anglicanism. You cannot marry a representative of Islam, Judaism, or Buddhism.

The wedding of close relatives is prohibited (incest).

Weddings can only take place at the age of 18, not earlier!

It is important that the wedding date does not fall on a woman’s critical days. These days, representatives of the fair sex are prohibited from entering the temple.

The wedding takes place in 2 stages:

  1. Engagement. The newlyweds are baptized three times, the presentation of rings and the subsequent exchange of wedding rings three times.
  2. Sacrament. Here the spouses must answer the priest's questions. He says prayers. At the end, the newlyweds drink symbolic sips of church wine from a special cup.

At the end, the spouses walk around the lectern 3 times and receive a blessing (with the help of icons) for marriage.

How to do it?

Various circumstances can push spouses to dissolve their family union. Having separated according to the law in the registry office, the question arises: is it possible to dissolve a union made in heaven, is it necessary to do this and how to get divorced from a husband or wife?

Divorce is generally condemned by the Orthodox Church, although remarriage may be permitted under certain circumstances. However, if the spouse dies, the church accepts debunking.

Important! In any case, weddings are only allowed 3 times.

There are many reasons based on which the church gives permission to remarry:

  1. Change of faith by spouse.
  2. If the spouse committed infidelity or entered into a new marriage.
  3. Identification of diseases that can harm the second spouse, as well as future children (AIDS, leprosy, etc.), incurable psychiatric illness, drug addiction or alcoholism.
  4. Sexual addictions of an unnatural nature, according to the canons of the church: masturbation, homosexuality, etc.
  5. Infertility.
  6. A wife carrying out an abortion at her own request, without the doctor’s recommendations or her husband’s consent.
  7. Criminal acts in the form of an attempt on the life or health of a spouse and relatives, imprisonment.
  8. Repeated wedding with a living and legal spouse, with whom this ceremony has already been completed.
  9. Marriage before the age of 18, interkinship, or marriage against the will of a person.
  10. In the case where a spouse intentionally leaves the other for a long time.

Important! If you contact a church with a desire to get married again without good reason, you may be refused.

By looking at the data presented above, everyone can decide for themselves whether they need to be debunked. The opportunity to do this exists only in the presence of serious circumstances. Debunking as such can only exist when new marital relations arise, both official and ecclesiastical unions.

How much does the ceremony cost?

Any representative of the registry office can officially name the exact cost of a wedding in this institution, since it is clearly fixed and is mandatory.
In the case of a wedding, such a figure can hardly be heard. According to the laws of the Orthodox Church, the ceremony is performed free of charge. In fact, this is not so. Each temple has its own rules, which you should learn about in advance.

In some churches, a small monetary donation before the ceremony is sufficient. In small churches they may ask from 1 to 4 thousand rubles. In large churches, the ceremony can cost more than 10 thousand rubles.

Charging a fee for a wedding ceremony is equivalent to a monetary donation, so all funds go only to the maintenance of the church and clergy.

Reasons for dissolving the union

No two families are the same, no two cases are the same. It’s one thing if the wedding took place not because of the deep faith of the spouses, but because of a fashionable trend, a desire to please parents and go through a beautiful ritual. Another thing is if there are objective problems, and being together, people move away from God more than by taking on the sin of breaking up. Therefore, each request is considered individually

. However, there are some points that increase the likelihood of a favorable outcome.

The Church allows divorce in the following cases:

  • betrayal of one of the parties
    : first, the priest will try to reconcile the spouses, remind them that we all make mistakes, but if this fails, then the chance of dissolution of the relationship increases many times;
  • conversion of a husband or wife to another faith;
  • the wife had an abortion without her husband’s consent and without medical contraindications;
  • infertility is a very difficult moment: a strict priest will refuse if this is the only reason, because only God can decide how many children there will be in the family;
  • Diagnosed alcoholism or drug addiction
    : a certificate from a medical institution is required, just the love of drinking is not a valid reason;
  • domestic violence, also documented by law enforcement;
  • an incurable disease that is dangerous for future children
    , for example, AIDS or syphilis;
  • diagnosed incurable mental disorder;
  • sexual perversions, especially those threatening children;
  • long prison sentences;
  • new civil or official marriage of the former spouse;
  • missing for more than 3 years.

Advice!

If your reasons are not included in the list above, do not despair - submit a petition with your arguments. The Orthodox Church is merciful and tries to empathize with the situation of all its children without exception.

Nuances of debunking after the termination of a relationship registered in the registry office

After a break in relations at the official level in the registry office or in court, it will not be possible to carry out a similar procedure in the temple. The Institute does not propose issuing documents on spiritual separation. This is the main difference between a secular divorce and the dissolution of church ties.

At the same time, the reasons sufficient for ending the marriage of a man and a woman are most often insufficient for going through the procedure again in the temple. Thus, divergence of interests and problems with financial support will not be regarded by the church as valid reasons. It is worth noting that a repeat ceremony is allowed only to that person who was not guilty of discord with the previous spouse and was not caught in adultery. Permission is given only upon completion of the penance imposed by the institute.

Is it allowed to consolidate your relationship with a man (woman) without the consent of your ex-other half?

There are no such requirements. The presence of a former companion is not required. To carry out the procedure unilaterally, you must personally visit the temple together with your new chosen one.

What documents will be required and what else do you need to know about preparing for marriage?

If citizens have come to the conclusion that it is time to end their relationship and the partners have new chosen ones, then they need to prepare the following papers:

  • identification document;
  • paper confirming the official separation from the previous partner;
  • certificate of entry into a spiritual relationship;
  • if the debunking is associated with the loss of legal capacity of one of the parties, or an illness that cannot be treated, then the initiator will have to submit documents issued by medical organizations;
  • death certificate (if the partner died).

In addition to the mentioned papers, the couple must submit a petition to the Diocese, which will indicate their desire to undergo a second ceremony. The letter is addressed to the bishop. Companions will need to wait for the document to be reviewed. The term directly depends on the busyness of the Diocese. It is worth noting that the application is submitted only by one of the parties. The personal presence of both spouses is not necessary.

Many are interested in the question of the need to pay a fee for performing actions by a clergyman. In fact, the ceremony is not a legally significant procedure, which distinguishes it from registration with government agencies. Therefore, you will not have to pay for the ceremony. However, you should remember about voluntary donations. The priest will determine the amount and offer to deposit it into the church account.

Reasons for debunking

The debunking procedure presupposes the intention of one of the former spouses to reconnect their fate with another partner.
A simple desire to “try” oneself in a new relationship with a partner of the opposite sex is not enough to convince clergy to release each other from previous obligations placed before God. To successfully go through the debunking process, you will have to look for more compelling justifications:

  • Adultery of the second partner.
  • Artificial termination of pregnancy by the wife, when the spouse declares his disagreement, in the absence of contraindications from doctors.
  • The second husband changed his religion.
  • It is impossible to continue the family with the current partner due to his physiological inability.
  • The husband or wife has lost their legal capacity.
  • A disease that threatens the health of children (AIDS, sexually transmitted diseases, etc.).
  • If the second spouse remarried after a civil divorce.
  • Alcohol and drug addiction.
  • Danger of harm, threats from the spouse.
  • Convicted of pandering
  • The husband or wife lives separately for a long time.
  • The second partner has not reached the age of majority.
  • A marriage was concluded between relatives, which does not correspond to the canons of the Christian Church.

Before contacting clergy. One must consider whether the reasons for debunking fall into the list above. To recognize the dissolution of a marriage, you will need to enter into a church marriage again.

How many times can you get married?

To the question of how many times you can get married, the church answers quite unequivocally. If you can get permission to get married a second time without any problems, then when you go for permission to get married a third time, they will look at you openly condemningly. It is possible that they will try to set you on the right path, reminding you that rushing from wife to wife (from husband to husband) is not worthy of a true believer.

In fact, the maximum number of times a person can get married is three. Especially if you are under 50 years old. But the third time may not be blessed.

Here is an insightful video on this issue, in particular about the third marriage:

However, some priests may have a different opinion.

Going through the wedding procedure more than three times is considered a grave sin! And in principle, according to the church, one should not marry more than once, without objective reasons. Only a widower can obtain permission to get married again without censure according to church canons.

Approach the wedding procedure quite responsibly and seriously; go to the temple only if you are confident in the strength of your marriage bonds and are ready to enter into an alliance not only before people, but also before God. Remember that two people are responsible for the preservation of a marriage and you must be confident in your partner with whom you have decided to connect your life, that both of you are ready to do everything so that your marriage does not break up.

Rules for divorce in the church

Is it possible to get married in church after a divorce? Of course, it is possible, but there is a procedure for this. To get a divorce in the Orthodox Church, you need to contact the priest who once married you to your husband. Tell them that you want to get a divorce and are ready to break church ties. If you were unable to find the clergyman who once married you, then contact the one you can find. Life is unpredictable, time passes and people change, just like they change their place of work.

You will have a conversation with a clergyman, where you will tell all the circumstances that led to such a decision. He will tell you about all the ensuing consequences, what is the procedure for debunking a church marriage. After the conversation, you will need to write an appeal to the bishop of the diocese. It should indicate the following points:

  1. The place where you got married and the date of the wedding;
  2. Write a brief history of your marital relationship;
  3. Explain in detail what caused the breakdown of your family ties.

After completing the document, you will need to attach a package of documents. Everything is transferred to the priest with whom you spoke, he will write his own report on the situation, after which he will convey your appeal to the bishop.

How to get divorced after a divorce: procedure, documents, consequences

Met an old friend. We haven't seen each other for a long time, we have a lot to talk about. She laments that she divorced her husband and is planning to enter into a new marriage, but one thing weighs heavily on her: she is married to her former husband.

The word “debunking” was heard, and this is not the first time in recent years that I have heard it. As sad as it is, the topic is relevant. The dissolution of a church marriage became the subject of a conversation with a member of the canonical commission of the Nizhny Novgorod diocese, mitered Archpriest Vladimir Romanov.

Father Vladimir, lately the word “debunking” has been heard quite often. In my (of course, very subjective) opinion, the number of people who want to dissolve the bonds of church marriage is increasing.

Is it so? And if so, what do you think this is connected with? — With the crisis of the family institution. This year, at the beginning of September, we have already accepted 718 petitions for the dissolution of church marriages.

It happens at the level of a thousand every year.

  • marriage certificate with a new chosen one;
  • other documents that will confirm your words.

The reason for canceling the wedding must be documented, that is, provide the following documents:

  • documents from a medical institution about abortion, inability to bear children, or sexually transmitted disease;
  • a certificate from a psycho- and drug dispensary confirming registration;
  • certificate of being in prison or being prosecuted;
  • document confirming the missing person;
  • death certificate;
  • papers on contacting the police regarding the beating of one’s wife or children, on the removal of beatings, on the initiation of a criminal case.

Getting married after a divorce for the second time Don't forget to take with you the official document that will be given to you by the Diocese and a new marriage certificate.

Therefore, some married couples reinforce their official marriage with the sacrament of wedding, believing in the reliability of their relationship, and after some time they realize that they were mistaken. Then they have a question about how the debunking procedure occurs. After all, it is much more difficult to dissolve a union before God than a marriage registered in the registry office. The content of the article

  • The essence of a wedding and the difference from a regular marriage
  • Reasons for the procedure
  • How is it going?
  • Procedure without the consent of one of the spouses
  • How many times can you get married in a church?
  • Conclusion

The essence of a wedding and the difference from an ordinary marriage The essence of the church sacrament is that the union, recognized by a representative of the Orthodox Church, secures it not only on earth, but also in the heavenly world.

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